Monthly Archives

May 2015

working mom

it’s not a threat, it’s a promise

May 28, 2015

Our little guy has had a rough go of it lately. He’s been a little off. I think he maybe picked up a bug going around school (aka daycare) which has made him a bit more irritable. He’s also waking up WAY TOO EARLY and we’re trying to get him back down for the extra sleep he needs. (Easier said than done). He may also be going through a bit more of an attachment phase. All of which has created the perfect storm in an approaching 2 year-old which has lead to a boy that will cry at the drop of a hat. (Dad puts a shirt on – he sobs. We put yogurt in a bowl instead of giving him the GIANT container – he sobs. You get the idea…)

That said, leaving the house and being dropped-off at daycare has been on the list of unpleasant activities as of late. The kid that enthusiastically kissed me goodbye and went with Dad into the car, then popped out of Dad’s arms at daycare to play with his friends before even getting his coat off is replaced by a crying clinging little boy.

You know it’s bad when my husband basically passes off duty on me for a day, and by ‘pass’ I mean ‘forces duty upon me’ by all but refusing to take V to daycare. So I, by default, got drop-off duty. (To be fair, my husband does literally 98% of both drop-off and pick-up, it’s VERY RARE for daycare to see me – likeever – so I figured I could step-up this one time).

Let me preface this by saying that I’m pregnant and hormonal (a card I typically do not play but when you read about my display and subsequent response you’ll understand why).

Getting out of the house was not a problem. Got in the car and drove to daycare without a hitch. Walked through the door and into his classroom… this is where the problems started. He didn’t want me to go and was jumping for me to pick him ‘up! up! up!’ when I set him down to pull off his coat. I decided to sit with him and figured that would get him acclimated to the room and he’d be good for me to go. He was not good to go. Every time I even mentioned getting ready to leave he started sobbing. I say sob because most of the time V doesn’t just cry he full on sobs – very dramatic this one. It was heartbreaking. I could feel tears welling in my eyes. Finally I had to rip the band-aid off and place him in the arms of the teacher and head out the door. I cried the entire way down the hall, out the door and in my car for a good portion of my commute. I literally couldn’t talk about it when I was at work because it would cause me to cry. It was the worst. No wonder my husband didn’t want to drop him off!

Then again it doesn’t help matters that work is particularly challenging which piles onto my stress level and really was not an attractive activity to have to leave a sobbing toddler for. I would have much rather been hanging with him than dealing with things at the office. After this particularly trying day both on home and work front I was spent. Later that night when my husband returned home we were chatting about the day. (I use the word ‘chatting’ loosely it was more like me venting intensely and him patiently listening to me). I told him, in no uncertain terms, that if he wanted me to be on drop-off duty for V again I would literally walk into work and put in my notice. This was not a threat, this was a promise. I literally can. not. do. it. A bit dramatic? Yes. Far fetched? Not so much.

motherhood

mother’s day reflection

May 13, 2015

This, my second official Mother’s Day, I found myself reflecting on my journey to become someone’s ‘Mama.’

Mentally, leading up to having V, I had a tough time with things. I’ve mentioned before that I have a hard time with change and was worried about about the whole ‘becoming a mom’ thing and my lack of maternal instinct. In short, I was just plain scared about this journey I had chosen to embark on.

Having V with us for going on two years now I think every day how much time I wasted being worried and scared for something that turned out to be the most amazing thing that has ever happened in my life.

This tiny human is, most of the time, pretty awesome. Seeing him learn about himself and the world around him is crazy cool. Getting a hug and kiss from him and hearing his voice say ‘Mama’ is beyond… literally BEYOND.

Yes motherhood has been all of those things they say: exhausting, amazing, rewarding, etc. But most of all it’s exceeded my limited expectations of what my life with a child would be like. Thankfully my husband knew better than me, because this whole parenting thing is pretty f-ing awesome. I’m so glad I listened to him. (Yes… you read that right.)

working mom

Rachel Zoe is my spirit animal

May 8, 2015

I was surfing my favorite news sites quickly yesterday afternoon during my 4:15PM lunch break at work (yes lunch) and stumbled upon a a quick read on USA Today Life which talks about designer and business owner Rachel Zoe and her claim that creating an office nursery was her best business decision yet. As a fellow working mom who was motivated and committed to returning to my career after maternity leave I just loved the approach she took. I was compelled to read her essay in its entirety.

The icing for me was this quote:

“My advice to you: Never apologize for being dedicated to your kids and challenge those around you to not only acknowledge, but celebrate your ability to be a mother and an asset in the workplace.”

Work/Life balance is always a struggle, one that parenthood adds an additional layer onto for both mom and dad. Though it’s one, I would argue, that has also made me a better employee.

Just loved this take from her, so refreshing.

It may only be one small step, but it was taken like a boss.

uncategorized

vacation hangover

May 7, 2015

Returning from vacation is always a bummer. As soon as it starts – it’s over. We had an amazing time and were spoiled with a fantastic location, beautiful weather and family fun. The toughest part though was leaving these guys to head back to work. Made even tougher by a particular challenging time at the office.

Digging in and trying to dig out of this vacation hangover.

The weekend cannot come soon enough! (Even though I may be working…)